There are some things you can do about this. They are relatively simple but they take some work. And they take some courage and conviction.
The simplest thing you can do is:
- Pay attention to what you do and to what happens to you, not to what you think you wanted to do or wanted to happen to you and ask yourself:
- Why might I have wanted to do that? or Why might I have wanted that to happen?
- How did I contribute to doing this or to this happening?
- What does this tell me about what is going on inside of me that I may not be aware of?
- This is especially helpful when what you have done or what has happened to you is not what you wanted to have happen - is, in fact, something that will cause pain, problems, hardship, unwanted complications.